Mcvitie's Family Circle - 800g

McVitie's is the name on half the biscuits in a British cupboard, and Family Circle is the one meant for sharing. It sits somewhere between a single packet you keep to yourself and the fancy selection kept for best, which is exactly why it got opened so often.

People in Canada go looking for it because it is not just any biscuits. It is the specific assortment you picked through at your nan's, on Sunday afternoons, or while the grown-ups talked over your head. The mix you grew up with is the mix you want.

The practical bit: 800g of assorted biscuits, which is a generous amount for a house with tea drinkers in it. Keep it somewhere cool and dry, close it up properly between raids, and tip some onto a plate when people come round so it looks like you planned it.

It sits nicely in an order alongside a box of proper British tea bags, and a packet of digestives for the weekdays, so the assortment can be saved for company. In theory.